Animal of the Week: Janitor Dog

January 7, 2011 at 8:58 pm (animals, Good Things, Want)

NOT to be confused with The Dog Janitor, which is a company that cleans your dog shit. This is much different. This is a dog that cleans your shit. His name is Neo, he’s like a Matrix puppy from some kind of janitor Matrix!

Sad Keanu lost job to Janitor Dog


What more could you ask for? No longer are you burdened by having to get up off the easy-boy chair and carry your crushed cans of Coors (and/or Bud) Light all the way to the recycling bin. Or if you’re a real monster, the regular garbage.

Reuse Reduce and Recycle

But really, this is the most effective anti-littering campaign I’ve ever seen. Who wants to make the innocent little puppy do dirty work, pushing his little cart on his little legs with his little broom. Aww he so little.

He should be hired to appear on Hoarders , then the ratings would really fly.

proper training looks like this.

Now available in Otter:

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Office cats and you

November 25, 2010 at 4:08 pm (agencies, animals, Good Things, random, SapientNitro, Want)

Let us discuss the benefits of housing a small feline in your work environment.

Why is this perfect? I will tell you. A cat does not give a shit about you. It won’t bother you while you’re working, it won’t beg you to take it for a walk moments before a client meeting, it will just be present.

They boost morale
Happy workers are better workers. Kittens evoke happiness wherever they go. How can you not feel joy when a kitten stumbles into the room, maybe chasing its own tail like a really small drunk person, but cuter and covered in fluff.

Lolcats
With a cat in the office, you have endless opportunities to take photos of it in compromising positions, and make your very own lolcat captions.

Cats can be tables
What’s better than a table with stuff on it? That’s right, a cat with stuff on it.
If there’s an entire website dedicated to it, like stuffonmycat.com, it must be worth doing. Daily.

Cats = the internet
We work in online, the internet is our home and playground. That being said, we have to take into consideration… The internet fucking loves cats.

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Animal of the Week: Angora Rabbit

February 23, 2010 at 8:12 pm (animals, Want) (, , , , , , )

Buried within the depths of 150lbs of fluffy, white hair, therein lies….A bunneh.

find the rabbit

It came from Turkey, and used to be a popular pet for rich French people. So you know these guys are classy. At first glance, you might think you have encountered the yeti, but like most things in life, you just need to look a little deeper.

I eat Angora rabbits for breakfast

Though I’m positive they’re good for other things too, Angoras are bred mainly for their fur, because it is soft, silky, and there’s a shitload of it.

Here’s a video of one getting a haircut. The machine they’re using to hold it looks a little alarming, but don’t worry, I’m pretty sure it’s not dead.

They are also International. There are English ones, French ones, German ones, and my personal favourite, Giant ones.

yo Louise that rabbit is CRASI

The giant kind, are… Giant. Even bigger than Louise’ friend. They have so much goddamn fur, they try to clip it themselves (because they’re efficient like that), and could end up with “wool block”, similar to “throat block” or “choking”. If they have space to run, and get to eat fruit, it helps move the wool through their system and they can eat and shit alll the wool in the wolrd. Or on their bodies, which is probably equivalent to all the wool in the world.

I can't see shit

In conclusion, Angora rabbits would make the perfect pet. They’re playful, social, like attention, like toys such as pinecones, gloves, plastic balls, stuffed socks, they’re starting to seem a bit perverse. But all the better.
Bonus Feature: You can also use them as a pillow, they love their owners so it most likely wouldn’t bite your face off if you tried.

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Animal of the Week: Spiderman Lizard

September 21, 2009 at 6:52 pm (animals, crazy, trends, Want) (, , , , , , , , , )

watch out here comes the lizard spider man

watch out here comes the lizard spider man

Behold. It is a lizard, and it looks like Spiderman. Nothing could be more perfect, except if it were an actual spider, OR if Spiderman had been Lizardman the whole time. But it’s kind of too late for that now, he’s already too well established as Spiderman. And how would Lizardman become Lizardman? I don’t think they bite. Maybe he could get whiplash from the lizard’s tail, and it breaks the skin or something. Either way, irrelevant.

Oddly enough, in one episode of the retro Spider-Man cartoon, he and the Lizard King were actually enemies. Assuming mating would be out of the question after this, I’m not sure how Spiderman lizard came about.
This guy’s real name is the Mwanza flat-headed rock agama… But isn’t it so much more fun to say Spiderman lizard? I think so.

Facts with suggested additions about the real Spiderman Lizard.

-They’re from Sub-Saharan Africa. (We can say sewers of New York City for argument’s sake though)

-They have a diet of locusts, crickets, mealworms and waxworms. (We can say diet of criminals and street thugs for argument’s sake though)

-They can usually be seen basking on rocks in the heat of the day. (And fighting crime in alleyways in the dead of night)

-They can run on their hind legs and scale walls. (Addition not needed as this is already awesome.)
spiderman_lizard

These apparently make very good pets, as if you weren’t already sold. But good luck getting one, demand is crazy and they’re sold out in most exotic pet stores. Karen Baker, the owner of a reptile specialist store in the UK says, “People are drawn to them because of their unusual colourings.”….. Yeah, maybe…Or because it looks like fucking Spiderman!

The comic fans are the most die-hard in finding this lizard as a pet. But I hope they do thorough research before buying. When the Agamas look cool, they look really cool, but these guys also turn brown a lot. What a disappointment that would be if you weren’t expecting it… Or anytime, really.

Not brown yet, still good

Not brown yet, still good

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Animal of the Week: Miniature Dwarf Horse. Wha?

August 12, 2009 at 3:25 pm (animals, crazy, News, Want) (, , , , , , , , )

kodaandkitteh
LOOK AT IT. It’s the size of a KITTEH! SO little. So so little. There’s an explanation for that. It’s Koda! He’s an American miniature horse, who was also born a dwarf. Like a really short person who was also born a midget, kind of, not really.
Koda is so small, he is often mistaken for a stuffed toy, or battery operated toy if he’s walking. Standing at only 59cm (AWW) tall, he’s just 13-months old and has suffered a handful of health problems. But he has also pulled through them all, because he is a little. effing. trooper.

His next surgery is extensive dentistry to remove his protruding adult teeth that won’t fit in his little mouth.
‘He’s very brave and takes his medicine like a little man,’ said Dr Andy Lynch (Koda’s vet).

hai guise

hai guise

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All I Want for Christmas…

June 11, 2009 at 7:15 pm (crazy, Design, Good Things, Want) (, , , , , , , )

…is this freakin’ Star Wars toaster

setting: darth

setting: darth

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Jam with Tamarama

June 5, 2009 at 2:18 pm (crazy, Good Things, Gossip, kate, Music, News, Shout outs, Toronto, Want) (, , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , )

Jay and Pottsy of Tamarama

Jay and Pottsy of Tamarama


So, my roomie Hilary and I went to a Darfur benefit concert this Tuesday at the Berkeley Heritage Church, featuring Australian import band, Tamarama.
You might recognize the frontman, Jay, from MTV’s The City. Once we managed to get past the fact that we were surrounded by swooning 16 year old girls, it was pretty fun. The bar was barren though so we had to make our way across the street to a very shady bar called Buffalo’s, where we got into an argument with a man about the skillset of Lady Gaga, and discussed the Dixie Chicks. Then his girlfriend threatened to beat us up, for allowing conversation.
ANYHOO. The show was fun, but what was more fun was coincidentally befriending the band’s manager, who allowed us our own meet and greet session.
4some

4some

. Everyone was soo excited to meet Jay and Pottsy because they are former models and Jay was on The City, AND dated the hottest girl alive, my favourite VS model. We were equally excited to meet the other guys too, the forgotten ones!
sweet little Jasper, we wouldn't forget you

sweet little Jasper, we wouldn't forget you


During our meet and greet, we half jokingly suggested they come to a bar with us, since we were probably the only girls in there of legal drinking age. And he proceeded to say the single greatest possible word that could have come out of his mouth at that exact moment…”Okay.”…. Wait, what? Now the pressure was on to think of a hip enough bar to impress them with, but the first suggestion that came out was, “not Buffalo’s”. Knowing where NOT to go is at least a start. I said if this actually happened I would eat my ticket.
P1030405
Anyways, we ended up at the Drake Hotel, pretty snazzy. There was tequila, it got pretty sloppy, especially for a Tuesday night. We left Jay the hot aussie in a pool of admirers (how the eff did they get in, does the Drake only ID on weekends?) got some drunk pizza which was in a word, awesome, and made it home in time to sleep for an hour before work. W00t!
post-tequila

post-tequila


We did it all for the good cause! 100% of ticket sales went to benefit Darfur.
the band

the band

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Super Mario Bros. are back. And Wii has it.

June 2, 2009 at 7:08 pm (Good Things, News, Want) (, , , , , , , )

it'sa me, Mario

it'sa me, Mario

Finally some good news. Nintendo has announced the release of “New Super Mario Bros” for the Nintendo Wii. It seems to be getting very “meh” reviews and predictions (see comments), but those are obviously from people who don’t understand the compassion some others have for classic Mario. I’ve also heard talk of a Mario Galaxy 2 coming up also.
Add to cart. Immediately.

This entirely makes my day. I’m going to make sure all friends with any connections, direct and/or indirect, to video game stores have my name on a reserved copy the second they arrive.
wiiibros

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The Jerboa is the best animal ever discovered

May 29, 2009 at 3:52 pm (animals, crazy, random, Want) (, , , , , , , , , , , , , , )

Jerboa3
Imagine the possibilities if a kangaroo and a mouse ever got hammered one night and ended up hooking up. Then, they experimented with some mind altering drugs, and called over a rabbit to join them. The result may look something like this…
jerboajump
It is a long-eared Jerboa and it is magical. It resides in Asia and Northern Africa, Egypt, and is described as a jumping desert rodent. Their ears are one of their more prominent features, and ear sizes range from BIG ears

Dumbo ears

Dumbo ears

to little ears.
wtf you lookin at

little ears


So far what I’ve learned about them is…
-They’re awesome
-Nocturnal
-They like sand
-Hop a lot
-Some eat seeds and plants, others eat insects, and some are omnivores. They’re just like us!
-The Egyptian Jerboas rely on their food to provide them with moisture, so they do not drink at all and never get invited to parties.
-2 species are considered threatened: the 5-toed Pygmy Jerboa and the thick-tailed Pygmy Jerboa.
My personal favorite is the Long-eared Jerboa. See? Even a freaking zoologist called them extraordinary!
Four-toed Jerboa looks like a peanut

Four-toed Jerboa looks like a peanut

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Because it’s Thursday!

May 28, 2009 at 8:59 pm (animals, crazy, random, Want) (, , , , , , , , , )

Hey… Have a look at this guy… What’s he doing? He’s so craazy.

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